Beano to the rescue, maybe not!

Has a woman ever divorced her husband due to excessive flatulence? I may just be the first woman to do so. It's a known fact that men produce a lot of gas. When I married my husband I agreed to love, honor and tolerate his gas issues but enough is enough already. Between him and the dog my house smells worse than a cat litter box. I use so many matches to destroy the smell that I should own stock in the Diamond match company (said in her best Groucho Marx voice with cigar hanging out of mouth) When my 23 year old Son...who is a pro himself regarding gas, complains about his Old Man's tooting, you know it must be bad!! We decided to have an intervention and we armed ourselves with a bottle of "gas extermination" called Beano. My husband was very resistant to part with his gas. It really has defined who he is as a person. This is a man who many years ago asked me to make the most fart producing meals so he could win a fart contest at work. After lots of negotiating and threats, he decided he would try Beano. I hand him the bottle and tell him to chew two. He refuses! Says he will wait until he has gas before he takes it. I yell, read the label....."help stop the gas before it starts". Sigh, tomorrow I plan on hiding these tablets in his food. You want to fart like a dog you will get treated like one :)